A Brief Primer On Cuddling
Dr. Wall discusses the importance of marital cuddling. Marriages without cuddling struggle with coldness and anger; those with regular, dependable cuddling are marked by closeness, connection and...
View ArticleA Primer on Affair Issues
The first question that comes up after a trust violation in marriage is: Do both partners need to come to therapy or just the person who violated the trust? Dr. Wall clears the air on this issue and...
View ArticleFundamental Principles
Dr. Wall embraces the Manhattan Declaration, a call to Christians everywhere to be a conscience to the world on three very fundamental principles. I came that they may have life, and have it...
View ArticleRekindling Love in Marriage: A Success Story
Recently, a couple Dr. Wall was working with, shared how they were able to turn around a failing marriage into a successful one. With their generous permission, he shares their success secrets so that...
View ArticleHealing From A Broken Relationship: Moving On
Dr. Wall encourages those abused in previous relationships or childhood to move beyond victim status and embrace life and their future. It’s too easy, for people who have been stomped on, to wallow in...
View ArticlePart Two On Lessons From Tiger Woods
Dr. Wall draws another lesson from the recent Tiger saga. Click here to read Dr. Wall’s blog on the first two lessons from Tiger Wood’s recent problems with infidelity. Be still, and know that I am God...
View ArticlePart Three On Lessons From Tiger Woods: Needed: A New Culture Where Sexuality...
Dr Wall laments the cheapening of sexuality in our society and proposes a better way. This is Part Three of a three-part series on Lessons From Tiger Woods. See here for the first and here for the...
View ArticleMarriage: Take the Long View
Dr. Wall mocks the idea that your spouse will never change. We are born to trouble as sparks fly upward. Job 5:7 For this light and momentary trouble is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory...
View ArticlePart Eight: Living As Roommates: The Foundation of Meaningful, Marital Sexuality
In Dr. Wall’s last blog he exposed some of the hurtful thoughts, feelings and actions around sexuality that create havoc in marriage. He suggested that married couples who live this way are really...
View ArticlePart Nine: Living As Roommates: A Primer on Sexual Desire
Dr. Wall continues his series on roommates vs. husbands and wives (for others in this series click here) by explaining how our changing sexual desire patterns over our lifetimes can be a source of hurt...
View ArticlePart Eleven: Living As Roommates: Love With Dignity and Grace
Dr. Wall continues his series on living as married roommates vs. living as husband and wife by looking at just a few of the consequences of divorce. Married roommates too often divorce without ever...
View ArticleThe Two Principles of Life
Dr. Wall explains the two major principles behind the themes in his blogs and therapy practice. He suggests they are not just limited to his blogs, that they are played out in our lives every day....
View ArticleFork In The Road Therapy
Dr. Wall explains that his philosophy of marital therapy can be reduced to the simple principle of a fork in the road. At any given moment, you can choose to go down the wide road or the narrow path. I...
View ArticleGrow Up Already!
Dr. Wall ponders the two paths that lay before us when we get married and become parents. One is a road to maturity. The other is not so pretty. When Enoch had lived 65 years, he became the father of...
View ArticleHappy First Year Anniversary!
Congrats to Dr. Wall for continuing his blog for a year! He started posting to this blog one year ago yesterday (March 8, 2009). He reflects on the last year. My heart overflows with a good theme; I...
View ArticleIf Only You’d Change, We’d Be Fine
Dr. Wall looks at our propensity to blame our spouse for our marital problems. He finds this approach lacking and suggests a better way. Accept one another. Romans 15: 7 Give preference to one another...
View ArticleHow To Create Hell On Earth
Dr. Wall lets his mind wander on the particularly depressing theme of the propensity of wives to complain and husbands to be defensive. He should probably keep his thoughts to himself. There are two...
View ArticlePart One On Healing From An Affair
In this first in a series Dr. Wall explains a very important step that must take place for healing to occur after an affair. Through love and faithfulness, sin is atoned for. Proverbs 16:6 Normally one...
View ArticleYour Fighting Will Kill You
Dr. Wall comments on a recent New York Times article on the negative effects of fighting in marriage. Disagreements are normal in marriage. Being mean about it is another thing altogether. Several...
View ArticleCheap Therapy: Naked Room Secrets*
Dr. Wall gives some common sense, cheap fixes in the marriage bedroom to warm up your lives together. Structure determines function. Engineering 101 One of the first things a new engineering student...
View ArticleLessons From Ben Roethlisberger: Character Counts, Part 2 of 2
In this second of a series on character and integrity, Dr. Wall uses Ben Roethlisberger’s latest troubles as a launching pad to discuss the effects on our loved ones of not being true to our word. For...
View ArticlePart Four On Healing From An Affair: The Trust Formula: Re-Building Trust...
Dr. Wall discusses how trust is re-built after trust has been violated. Hang on to your hat. We’re in for a wild ride. This is part of a larger series On Healing From An Affair. For the first click...
View ArticlePart Five On Healing From An Affair: The Latest on Affair Research
Dr. Wall shares some of the latest research on affairs that he learned at a recent workshop he attended. This is part of a larger series of blogs On Healing From An Affair. To see the first one click...
View ArticleA Marriage Improvement Program: Get OUT of Debt!
Dr. Wall theorizes that marriage problems increase as debt increases and that one sure-fire way to improve your marriage is to start working together as a team on knocking your debt out ASAP! The...
View ArticlePart One On Communication: Careful! You May NOT Be Able to Read My Mind After...
In this first blog on a series on Communication Dr. Wall looks at the current research about how we can read (or not!) each other’s minds. He probably lets his mind wander just a tad too much. To...
View ArticlePart Two On Communication: We Have Trouble Communicating. NO, You Don’t!
In this second blog of a series on communication Dr. Wall ponders the messages we convey to our spouse when we shut down and won’t talk. Communication is occurring in spades, but it might not be the...
View ArticlePart Three On Communication: Forcing The Conversation Doesn’t Work
In this third in a series of blogs on communication between husbands and wives Dr. Wall gives advice to the partner that tends to want to talk about issues more than the other and suggests using the...
View ArticlePart One: Al and Tipper Gore: A Cautionary Tale
Dr. Wall uses the latest announcement from Al and Tipper Gore, that they are divorcing after 40 years of marriage, to look at what we might learn. For Part Two click here. What therefore God hath...
View ArticleAn Open Letter To My Son, Brandon, and His Lovely Wife, Philly On The Birth...
Dr. Wall uses the occasion of the birth of his son new daughter two days ago in Cambridge, England, to discuss surviving marriage with two children. June 24, 2010 Dear Brandon and Philly, What with the...
View ArticlePart One On Sexual Desire: The Second Saddest Thing Said About Marriage
Dr. Wall suggests that marriages cannot stay warm and tender without regular sexual encounters between husband and wife, so if one person in the marriage cuts that life-blood off, that person is...
View ArticlePart One: Proverbs on Communication
Dr. Wall starts a series on the subject of communication from the Book of Proverbs in the Bible. The wisdom of Solomon is still relevant to us today. Since I just finished two blog series on money...
View ArticleHappy Birthday Dr. Wall! Reflections From the Therapist’s Chair
Dr. Wall reflects on his 59th birthday on a verse that has puzzled him for 40 years. Why should fools have money in hand to buy wisdom, when they are not able to understand it? Proverbs 17:16 This...
View ArticlePart Two: The Hiway to an Affair or Abuse: The Slippery Slide
Dr. Wall exposes how affairs and abusive relationships develop as a warning to all of us to guard our hearts. One of my readers suggested to me that I expand upon my last blog and discuss how an affair...
View ArticlePornography, Texting, Sexting, Emailing, Chatting, Cell Phone Calls to...
Dr. Bing expands on an idea he started to explain in Podcast #4 that the boundaries in marriage are to be honored. If you ignore the boundaries of marriage to justify your penchant for the unseemly,...
View ArticleAsk Dr. Bing Podcast #6: Dr. Bing Wall’s Story: Why He Became A Marriage...
Dr. Bing answers the question why he became a marriage therapist in this lastest podcast from “Ask Dr. Bing.” _____ Not everyone cares about the background of their therapist, but for those that do, I...
View ArticleWhat About the Mistresses?
A recent article in the Washington Post, by Roland C. Warren, founder of The Fatherhood Initiative, asks why it is that famous men get all the heat from an affair and the mistresses go on Oprah. Hmmm....
View ArticleAsk Dr. Bing Podcast #7: What is Our Approach to Marital Therapy?
Dr. Bing answers the question of what is our approach to marital therapy. We use a mentoring-coaching method that encourages couples to learn from their mistakes and to try new things. In addition, Dr....
View ArticleAsk Dr. Bing Podcast #8: Dr. Bing Wall Formally Introduces the Thriving...
Dr. Bing Wall formally introduces the Thriving Couples Model to the public at large today in a podcast, graphic, chart and narrative explanation. The Model helps couples and marital therapists...
View ArticleHerman Cain and the Definition of An Affair
Dr. Bing uses Herman Cain’s recent collapse as an opportunity to clear the air on the definition of an affair. _____ With the scandal at Penn State around child molestation in the guise of a...
View ArticleAsk Dr. Bing Podcast #12: What If My Spouse Won’t Go To Therapy?
Dr. Bing answers the question in the Ask Dr. Bing Podcast #12: What If My Spouse Won’t Go to Therapy? _____ Marital therapy works best if both partners go together. One partner might not want to go...
View ArticlePart Three: Dickens’ David Copperfield on the Family: Birth Children Feeling...
On this recent 200th year anniversary of Charles Dickens’ birth (February 7, 1812) Dr. Bing takes a trip back through Dicken’s most autobiographical work, David Copperfield, for some insight into the...
View ArticleThe Real Marriage Killer
Dr. Bing exposes the real secret to destroying your marriage without even trying. That’d be the key: without even trying. _____ Do not drag me away with the wicked, with those who do evil, who speak...
View ArticleFour Negative Patterns to Avoid or Kill Your Marriage in the Process
Dr. John Gottman, the premier marital researcher, was on television this week and reveals some important negative behaviors that predict divorce. _____ Those of us in the marital therapy and marital...
View ArticleEncouragement From The Trenches: A Past Client Thanks Carol For Marital Therapy
One of Carol's past clients wrote her a thank you and with his permission we're posting it here for your encouragement (names and social markers removed, of course. A few edits were made.). Marital...
View ArticleAfter An Affair Shouldn’t I Just Divorce?
Dr. Bing explains trust violations are hard for couples to handle alone, but with some outside guidance and gentle nudging many couples can heal and even thrive after an affair.
View ArticleShouldn’t I Divorce If I Can’t Trust Anymore?
Dr. Bing explains why building trust is so difficult, but encourages that it can be done.
View ArticleCan Cohabiting Couples Benefit from Marital Therapy?
Dr. Bing seeks to reduce the fears of cohabiting couples about marital therapy.
View ArticleHeart to Heart Is Looking for New Therapists!
Due to more people wanting our services, we are happy to announce we are looking for 2 competent part-time counselors (to the right person could become full-time) for the Des Monies (Urbandale) and...
View ArticleCan Marriage Therapists Present a Point of View?
This is another blog in a series from old things I’m finding cleaning out files…past due, no doubt (click Here for the others). The quote below is left over from my dissertation back in my Ph.D....
View ArticleDr. Bing’s Comments on Quotes (003): In Praise of Male-Female Differences
“Where there is a withdrawn or silent man, there is usually a critical woman.” Steven Stosny and Patricia Love, How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It First off: this quote is a bit...
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